Kamila Kaminska ICEEFT, EMDR UK & Ireland Couples Counselling and EMDR Therapy in Newbury, Reading & Online

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"Love is like a poem. It starts with delight and ends in wisdom."

Couples Counselling, Psychotherapy & EMDR Therapy in Newbury & Online

Are you finding life difficult at the moment?
Is your relationship going through rocky times?

I may be able to help.

Please note Kamila's practice is now full and the waiting list is closed.
Please check EFT Therapists Directory on British EFT Centre website. Many of the therapists there provide therapy online.

The time since the start of the pandemic has been challenging for many relationships. If you cannot access a couples therapist for whatever reason, please get in touch to sign up for my next online Hold Me Tight workshop. This relationship-enhancing program was created by experts in Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy.

Welcome. KamilaCounsellingNewbury

Hello and warm welcome. Kamila is a Certified Emotionally Focused Couples Therapist, EFT Supervisor and EMDR Therapist working with a great variety of couples and individuals. Her counselling and psychotherapy practice is based in Newbury, near Thatcham. She also provides online couples counselling and online supervision.

Whether you are seeking support for your relationship or family, I believe it is worth talking about it with a qualified therapist. If you are looking to process some difficulties in your life, couples counselling or EMDR therapy may be able to help you effectively address issues you are dealing with. I hope this website can help you to get a sense if I may be a good fit for what you are looking for.

I work with couples who want to heal past hurts. Together we can find ways for you to develop healthy coping strategies. We will draw on your strengths to rebuild your relationship or deepen the love you have for each other.

Welcome. Library Image: Footsteps in Sand

Couples counselling - what to expect?

Below you can read a general guide to couples counselling. This format changes as needed for issues such as trauma, affairs and other significant relationship events.

Some couples want homework assessments to supplement in-session work. For those that do, I recommend an excellent book: “Hold Me Tight” by Sue Johnson. It follows the stages of therapy described below with weekly exercises.

Couples counselling takes on average 12-20 sessions, depending on the level of couple distress, and commitment to the relationship and counselling itself.

Please be aware that recovering from an affair or when there is a history of trauma is a complex process and usually takes at least a year.


When we meet for the first time, I will invite you to talk about what you would like to work on or resolve in therapy as a couple. If we all agree to continue after this session, we will then come up with a plan for our work together and set up regular sessions time. Depending on your situation I may invite each of you to come for an individual session to do further assessments.

You can treat the stages described below as a map, which will help to identify where you are getting stuck as a couple and how to move forward.

Stage 1 We Are Caught in a Trap

The first stage of couples counselling lays a foundation for a deeper, lasting change in the relationship. The aim here is to help you de-escalate the conflict, tensions or intensity of arguments between you and your partner, so you can start having different, more connected conversations about the issues that brought you to therapy.

The main points of this stage are:

  • Understanding your own unique arguing cycle
  • Recognising moments of attacking, blaming and defending
  • Indentifying who pursues ↔ who withdraws
  • Finding the softer emotions that are rarely felt, much less shown
  • Calming the arguing cycle, coming closer

  • This stage requires regular, weekly sessions for the best results.

    Welcome. Heart2heart

    Stage 2 Knowing Me, Knowing You – There is Something We Can Do

    When you and your partner feel more able and safer to reconnect, you start to be more accessible, responsive and engaged with each other. You start reaching out for each other in new ways. This is how lasting change happens, so you will not be caught in the trap of an escalating conflict again.

    At this stage we will be focusing on understanding the more withdrawing partner and the more pursuing partner. The main points here are recognising your own fear and needs and how to reach out to each other in new ways to deal with the problem that brought you to therapy.

    This stage can be done with weekly or fortnightly sessions.

    Stage 3 Facing the Future Together

    The work is almost done! At this point of your journey, both of you can feel safe, engaged and trusting each other. Old issues are dealt with, or you are confident that you can rely on each other to resolve them. Once again you are looking into the future together.

    This stage focuses on:

  • Continuing to open up to each other
  • Dealing with missteps as they happen
  • Tackling problematic issues as a team

  • This stage is usually very brief and fortnight sessions are recommended.

    Welcome. CoupleHappy

    I hope this brief guide to couples therapy answered some of the questions you may have about the process. Please remember this is a guide only - the journey and final destination are yours!

    (The guide is an edited version of the couples counselling overview from Couples Zone.)

    Are you looking for a couples counsellor in Newbury, Thatcham, Reading or online? I am a qualified counsellor and psychotherapist for couples and an EMDR practitioner.

    To find this website easily next time, try searching for 'counsellor in Newbury', 'couples psychotherapist in Reading' or 'online couples counselling'.

    Counselling & psychotherapy for couples in Newbury, Reading and online therapy. Therapist for Kingsclere, Highclere, Hungerford, Thatcham, Basingstoke and surroundings.

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