Individuals & Couples Counselling for Newbury, Hungerford & online therapy
Are you finding life difficult at the moment?
Is your relationship going through rocky times?
I may be able to help.
Call me on 0749 887 3552
Hello and warm welcome. I am one of the only thirteen Certified Emotionally Focused Couples Therapists in the UK and also a qualified, BACP registered counsellor working with a great variety of individuals and couples. My counselling practice is based in Newbury, near Thatcham and Hungerford. I also provide online counselling.
Whether you are seeking support for yourself or your relationship, I believe it is worth talking about it. I hope this website can help you to get a sense if I may be a good fit for what you are looking for.
You can contact me in a way that feels most comfortable to you: whether it is dropping me an email or having a chat over the phone to see if counselling is what you need at this time. Please note I aim to respond to all enquiries within 24 hours Monday - Friday. If you haven't heard from me within this time, please check your spam folder.
Couples counselling - what to expect?
Below you can read a general guide to couples counselling. This format changes as needed for issues such as trauma, affairs and other significant relationship events.
Some couples want homework assessments to supplement in-session work. For those that do, I recommend an excellent book: “Hold Me Tight” by Sue Johnson. It follows the stages of therapy described below with weekly exercises.
Couples counselling takes on average 12-20 sessions, depending on the level of couple distress, and commitment to the relationship and counselling itself.
Please be aware that recovering from an affair or when there is a history of trauma is a complex process and usually takes at least a year.
When we meet for the first time, I will invite you to talk about what you would like to work on or resolve in therapy as a couple. If we all agree to continue after this session, we will then come up with a plan for our work together and set up regular sessions time. Depending on your situation I may invite each of you to come for an individual session to do further assessments.
You can treat the stages described below as a map, which will help to identify where you are getting stuck as a couple and how to move forward.
Stage 1 We Are Caught in a Trap
The first stage of couples counselling lays a foundation for a deeper, lasting change in the relationship. The aim here is to help you de-escalate the conflict, tensions or intensity of arguments between you and your partner, so you can start having different, more connected conversations about the issues that brought you to therapy.
The main points of this stage are:
This stage requires regular, weekly sessions for the best results.
Stage 2 Knowing Me, Knowing You – There is Something We Can Do
When you and your partner feel more able and safer to reconnect, you start to be more accessible, responsive and engaged with each other. You start reaching out for each other in new ways. This is how lasting change happens, so you will not be caught in the trap of an escalating conflict again.
At this stage we will be focusing on understanding the more withdrawing partner and the more pursuing partner. The main points here are recognising your own fear and needs and how to reach out to each other in new ways to deal with the problem that brought you to therapy.
This stage can be done with weekly or fortnightly sessions.
Stage 3 Facing the Future Together
The work is almost done! At this point of your journey, both of you can feel safe, engaged and trusting each other. Old issues are dealt with, or you are confident that you can rely on each other to resolve them. Once again you are looking into the future together.
This stage focuses on:
This stage is usually very brief and fortnight sessions are recommended.
I hope this brief guide to couples therapy answered some of the questions you may have about the process. Please remember this is a guide only - the journey and final destination are yours! I am always happy to discuss any questions, issues and concerns you may have about your therapy with me.
(The guide is an edited version of the couples counselling overview from Couples Zone.)
Are you looking for a couples therapist in Newbury or online? I am a qualified counsellor for couples and individuals. You can contact me here.
To find this website easily next time, try searching for 'counsellor in Newbury', 'couples therapist in Newbury' or 'online therapy'.
Counselling for couples and individuals in Newbury and online therapy. Therapist for Hungerford, Thatcham, Basingstoke, Marlborough and surroundings.